I’ve been fighting off this feeling

For longer than I can remember

The need to understand a language that your mouth fails to speak

The need to have a home

(Frantically) Looking for it in people

In the beds of lovers

Longing for it in the sky

In the land

The need to drive to my mother’s house

to have Sunday family lunches,

The need to stop wondering if they know I’m different,

that I’m not from here

To stop wondering if they can see it in the way my eyes slant

The way my nose curves

The way I say my a’s and my e’s

The need to not always be

A stranger

A mystery

A foreigner




It lingers over you like an unpaid debt

Ringing and echoing “you do not belong here”

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