Tag: life

Sex

I couldn’t even really say the word sex out loud until I was 14. Even then it was whispered, or mimed or camouflaged as “banging” or “IT”. Growing up in a semi-conservative African family, sex was one of those things that no one really wanted to acknowledge or talk about.

2017

  I have managed to get my thoughts together, after surviving the agonizing anxiety of the first 2 days of the year. “What are your plans this year? Any resolutions? What do you think needs to change?” Even if (by some supernatural force of nature) I had all these answers

fading.

At 16. Heartbreak sounded like a thousand buildings crashing down, a tornado, a countless number of sleepless nights and twisted sheets. An unfamiliar pain and tears coming from places you didn’t know could cry  At 20. Heartbreak sounded like a car crash, ambulance sirens, a crime scene filled with broken

adjustment.

My heart is a construction site.  It echoes like a drill in my chest  Slowly coming apart  I sigh deeply  Pushing back the tears that have been welling in my eyes for weeks I pace my room  Gathering courage to leave it.  Everything in here And everything out there  Makes

home.

Home is not where the heart is The heart is always fleeting  So home is always fleeting  Home is where you are now  Where you find solace for now  Where you can be the best version of you now Home is what makes you feel most yourself Exposed yet safe 

flower. 

 Why can’t a flower be a flower If it’s too beautiful it must be plucked If it’s to shy, it will never be acknowledged  If it has too many thorns it must be mutilated  Why do we never leave the flower alone Its life is short anyway  Maybe it

beauty…

…A STORY. I looked up at my mother as a child  And thought… I will never be as beautiful as her when I grow up  No woman will ever be As a teenager I watched As my peers started developing Curves on their bodies  And edges in their hearts  I

free.

   It’s a wonderful thing  Having unconventional skin  Waking up  And making a choice To be different  To be more of you than you were yesterday  To hold eye contact To not look down  To not be intimidated by judgement  To be a little free 

awaken.

   You have been deteriorating Before yourself  That pain you couldn’t figure out before?  That was your dreams being ripped out of your heart  The suffocating consequence of concerning yourself with other people’s failures  Surrounding yourself with small thinkers and small ideas and small men  While all this time you

anxiety. 

i don’t want to be right i just want to be honest lies keep evaporating my time this home left me homeless   And i tried hiding tried finding silence swam the breadth of my heart (shit.) i almost drowned in it   and all these faces they scare me

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