Tag: thoughts

2017

  I have managed to get my thoughts together, after surviving the agonizing anxiety of the first 2 days of the year. “What are your plans this year? Any resolutions? What do you think needs to change?” Even if (by some supernatural force of nature) I had all these answers

enough.

 When will you understandThat you will never be beautiful enough  You will never be intelligent enough You will never be adventurous enough You will never  Be Enough  for the man who does not love you  Stop trying to feed someone who starves you You are grinding away your heart,

refuge.

I’ve been searching for refuge I might as well have been scratching through dustbins overflowing with waste I looked for it in in the walls of churches, in the words of friends, in the beds of lovers, in the pages of books, in the sun, in the moon, in the burnt

flower. 

 Why can’t a flower be a flower If it’s too beautiful it must be plucked If it’s to shy, it will never be acknowledged  If it has too many thorns it must be mutilated  Why do we never leave the flower alone Its life is short anyway  Maybe it

posession.

The butterflies in my stomach  Were asleep until I met you  You made my ‘inner-mosts’ run wild  Like a child after 3 ice lollies and a chocolate bar  You made my mind reach across its oceans and pull out the things I thought no one could ever understand  You rescued

anxiety. 

i don’t want to be right i just want to be honest lies keep evaporating my time this home left me homeless   And i tried hiding tried finding silence swam the breadth of my heart (shit.) i almost drowned in it   and all these faces they scare me

undone.

   You feel choked  You feel like your heart cannot fathom the thought of One More  Beat You feel your whole world spinning  Constellations falling out of the skies  Waters rising from their oceans, trees collapsing starved with famished roots  Chaos  Chaos  Disaster  You feel like there are a million

monsters.

   Monsters are people Who are loved by someone  that they don’t love back Yet hoard their affection  Dry them out of hope and trust  Then let them go Monsters are people  Who are loved by someone  They don’t love back  But are scared of being alone  So they hurt

prisonbreak.

   I don’t mean to overwhelm you With all my I love you’s  It’s just  I guess  My body was holding all of them in  for so long. They were pilling up in my throat cramped and breathless  And when the first one escaped… well, it turned into a prison

lonliness.

   There is a sort of freedom , a joyous childlike unbounded sense of life that comes from letting go of everything you thought you needed.  Being alone. Unsurrounded by props and spirits of people you thought you knew.  Just you. And your terrifying fears that no longer seem so

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